The last few years have been such a whirlwind - so much has happened. Good. Bad. Ugly. Met new people. Lost touch with old ones. Got close to people. Then got afar from them. Got busy with work. Then got sick of it sometimes. Experienced some of the most beautiful moments. Experienced the pit of darkness as well. Been nice to people. Been real shit too.
New friendships forged, with possibilities of life-time togetherness. Started seeing some old friends in new light - putting down the rose-colored glasses. Called out on people who may be weren't worth it. Also made foolish mistakes.
Family - Another bout of illness in the family. Dad resiliently taking it all. Putting up fights with the illnesses, getting better and back on his feet, then down again, then up again. And finally losing the battle. My dad - my sunshine. The only one I have never been away from for an extended time period the last 26.5 years of my existence. The only constant in my life. My jaan. All I have left now is di. We laugh often that if something were to happen to either one of us, we would go mad. May be, we would. I don't have much faith in life anyways.
Career - Got selected as YCO, Attended prestigious awards, got noticed, got to travel - within India and abroad. Endeavour was an eye-opener, so many people from all over the world bringing in their experiences and their cultures. Experimented at work. Left my main account to test the mobile waters. Unlearned all I knew. People who didn't know me. My work. Met shitty clients. Got to know the value of the good ones. Went back to 360 digital world again and interesting clients with a varied portfolio. Got to know a new team. Many new people at workplace. Laughed. Cried. Got more greys in my hair. And also excitement at cracking something new. Had tough moments when I wanted to just quit, but somehow didn't. Somehow couldn't.
Me - I am stronger than before. And then I realize I'm still so much weak. I am restless. I am still wandering through life. I have changed so much - sometimes even I don't recognize myself any longer. For better? Or Worse? Only time will tell. The only thing still the same about me is - I'm still discovering life. It's mysteries. It's brutalities. In some ways its beauty too, though that's hard to hold on, isn't it?
And yes, I still don't understand life. Atleast that's something that I have carried on in life.
- RamblingsOfARestlessMind
